Help with potential mutual attraction with my friend

Crushing

So I (early 20s M) need some outside perspective.

A while back, I was a TA for someone my age. I thought he was cute at the time, but obviously I didn’t act on anything because he was my student. After he graduated and some time passed, I randomly ran into him outside my lab (he works in the same area doing safety stuff). I genuinely didn’t expect to ever see him again.

We ended up talking for like 30 minutes straight and exchanged numbers to hang out “as friends.” We started texting pretty regularly after that. A few weeks in, he opened up to me about being introverted and not very social most of his life. He said he’d recently downloaded dating apps for the first time and was trying to put himself out there more. He also randomly told me I’m a really great dude and he doesn’t know why he’s saying it but thanks. That stuck with me.

We kept talking basically every day. I probably started dropping subtle hints. Eventually we hung out and went to the aquarium, and it was honestly such a great time. We share a lot of mutual interests, compliment and support each other a lot, and he’s very emotionally kind. I’ve told him about my ex and how I still get sad sometimes, and he always tells me I can text him anytime and that he’d be there for me.

Here’s where I get unsure: he’s said he finds women consistently attractive and men sometimes attractive, but he’s never dated anyone. He says he doesn’t know if he just lacks experience. So I genuinely don’t know where he stands or if he even fully knows yet.

The problem is… I’m starting to develop real feelings beyond friendship. I’m not in a rush, and I truly value our friendship. I also want to respect his growth and his process figuring himself out. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to explore something more with him eventually.

So I guess my question is:

Do I say something at some point?

Do I just let things continue naturally and see if it becomes clearer?

How do I balance being honest about my feelings while not putting pressure on someone who’s still figuring themselves out?

I really don’t want to lose the friendship, but I also don’t want to sit on feelings forever

Posted Mar 1, 2026, 1:50 AM UTC

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