AIO or my partner doesn’t GAF about me? Lolz

My (32F) boyfriend (37M) and I flew to Phoenix this weekend to celebrate my birthday and go to a spring training game. After a 4.5-hour flight late Friday night, we were tired but in good spirits.

At the airport, he handed me one of our rolling bags (normal for us — I usually take that one) and then immediately speed-walked ahead toward the rental car area, which required multiple escalators and a tram. I have degenerative disc disease and spinal stenosis, and after sitting on the flight I was in significant pain. He knows this and knew my back was hurting. Additionally, he has been here before but it’s my first time, so I wasn’t entirely sure where we were going and obviously wanted to follow.

I called out that I was struggling to keep up and was in pain. He said nothing at all, just switched bags with me (handing me the heavier bag) and kept moving quickly without saying anything. I kept falling far behind and had difficulty managing the escalators with my suitcase. When I finally caught up at the tram, I asked why he was basically running away from me. He laughed and rolled his eyes.

At the rental car area he again rushed ahead and left me behind. I sat down to rest while he got the car. Later I told him I felt hurt and abandoned, and that I wished he’d communicated instead of leaving me to struggle alone. He said he was just trying to get the car faster. I dropped it to avoid a fight.

We got to the Airbnb around 1am. I unpacked while he relaxed, showered, and went to bed around 2:30am.

The next morning he woke me at 8am to say he was going to a dispensary. I stayed in bed since I was exhausted and sore. When he got back, he pushed me about getting up and making plans. I asked if he’d grabbed coffee creamer I mentioned needing — he hadn’t, and hadn’t asked if I wanted anything while he was out. I told him I was still upset about the airport situation because it made me feel like he didn’t care about me. He gave a half-hearted apology and said he was rushing bc he didn’t want to wait in line forever.

We eventually spent the day together exploring Phoenix/Scottsdale and things were okay, but he still hadn’t mentioned my birthday or asked what I wanted to do. Last night he suggested going back out to the casino; I wasn’t feeling it but offered to find something else. Instead of talking to me or bouncing ideas off each other, he fell asleep almost immediately.

At this point I was really hurt that he hadn’t acknowledged or planned anything for my birthday (the next day, now today). When I brought up planning something, he said, “What’s the point?” Because I often suggest switching up plans based on the weather or how my back is feeling- for context: if I’m not up for something we plan ahead of time I always tell him he can go on without me or suggest we still do it but maybe in a different order that day or on a different day and I follow through with doing those things. He is a very active person and I am too, but sometimes I’m just in a lot of pain and know I can’t push myself too hard.

I got upset and told him he’d been a terrible boyfriend this trip and that this was the worst birthday I could imagine.

If we’re being honest, the situation at the airport is really what has triggered all of this and I can’t help but see every shortcoming now as a total lack of care or consideration for me. I would never leave a friend behind like that, let alone a romantic partner.

Am I overreacting for being this hurt and angry about how he acted the first night of the trip?