Need replacement for the "you"s here. I feel like using "one" does not fit the story.
"It began with shrines built for him. Marble mixed with wood insulting the sky as every single one reached further to humble mountains, soon resulting in pillaring towers of concrete and paint. Stories followed the staircase upwards, with murals retelling Amara’s life. And once you learnt about the hardship that was his broken family, about his escape by becoming a god and punishing those who raised him in an environment that stained his skin with dirt, you were rewarded with a sight that beat your fiercest imagination. Above you would always be a clear sky, inviting you to shower beneath its brilliance."
the scene continues a little, and using "one would feel xxxx" instead does not sit right with me.
i wrote it with "you" because I was too excited to get to a certain scene to find replacement words, but it has been bugging me ever since. I concentrate too much on how the "you" bothers me to think of acceptable changes.
Posted Mar 1, 2026, 2:37 PM UTC