Secretly am in love with my cousin M/F

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hey all first time posting, I'm M32 years old , ever since I was a teenager-15-16 iv had feelings for my older cousin, always something I'd fantasize about but new it would never go anywhere from there ....not to mention she was like a mother figure to me .... she kinda took me under her wing an we did everything together . I wish she felt the same way for me as I do for her ,