I (29F) love my boyfriend (30M), but I feel like the default decision-maker and homemaker. Advice?

I (29F) have been in a relationship with my (30M) boyfriend for a couple months now, and we were dating more casually for a couple months before that. It's the first relationship I've been in since my early 20s. We have the foundation of a good relationship--we trust each other, communicate well, feel emotionally safe with one another, mutually put effort into the relationship, great physical chemistry, and have some similar interests.

I am typically a very independent person and it has been a learning curve for me to incorporate someone into my life so deeply and quickly. I know that I can be impatient and sometimes have a "my-way-or-the-highway" attitude towards things. I am working on it. That being said, there are a few minor annoyances I have with my boyfriend, but that is to be expected. Mainly, he doesn't have the best financial habits (nothing crazy, just not as responsible as I would prefer), but I don't think that's my place to comment on since we've only known each other 4.5ish months. That aside, he has quite a bit of social and regular anxiety, and is quite introverted, whereas I am very out-going and extroverted. When we're at home together, we have a great & fun time and he feels very comfortable. Sometimes, however, when we're out in public he is very shy and not particularly friendly to strangers. I am someone who wants to talk to everyone I meet and strike up conversations everywhere- I love people! He says he likes and admires this about me, but I find it odd when I am talking to people and he just stands there, looking at the ground, not saying anything. I know I can't change him, but it does irk me a bit. Again, these are just some minor things...

That is all just some context for the real reason I am writing to you today, my dear Redditors. The real reason is that I am starting to resent his (A) lack of decision making skills, and (B) his helplessness in the home.

We spend on average about 3 or 4 nights together a week, and any time we are deciding what to eat, it's always, "What did you think about doing for dinner?" or, "Where did you want to get food?". It is hardly ever, "I thought burritos sounded good" or, "I bought stuff for pizza". I am always expected to decide what and where we eat and it's slowly driving me crazy. I love to cook, and dare I say, I am a good cook. But, when it's expected of me, with no discussion prior, it bothers me. We spend about 85% of our nights together at my house, which I prefer, but that means that I am often cooking for two. He does always offer to bring groceries when he comes (and always asks what he should bring), but he usually calls before I've considered what I want to eat that evening. I've told him more than once that it's an emotional toll on me to always decide what we're eating. Also, since he has quite a few allergies, it really makes sense for him to put more effort/input into our meals. His mother is a fantastic cook, and I assume he's just used to someone else to cooking for him. When we are in the kitchen and I'm cooking, he's often just standing around, maybe putting music on, or petting my dog. If I ask, he will happily make a salad or roast vegetables to go with the main meal, but again, only if I ask (and it takes him an inordinate amount of time, but I digress). That leads into the second part, which is almost anything related to keeping the home. Now, I try to think of myself as level-headed, and I am very aware that he doesn't live in my house. It is my house. But, he never sets the table or washes the dishes or makes the bed or closes the cabinet doors or puts anything away after he's taken it out unless I ask. He knows I like things clean and organized, and I also have a roommate and we keep a pretty tidy home, so it bothers me when I have to constantly clean up after him. He spends a considerable amount of time in my house, and I recognize that my expectations in general to cleanliness are far higher than his, but when you are a constant guest in someone's home, don't you try to make it a point to be helpful? When I sleep at his house I make the bed and unload the dishwasher and tidy up the space because I want to show my gratitude.

I feel like I'm at a crossroads because I typically am really good at communicating, but he is very sensitive and I don't know how to have this conversation without coming across as "nagging" or being disappointed in him. He wants to be a good boyfriend and he really does love me. How do I address his lack of participation when he's at my house in a productive way? Is it something that can be talked through and worked out? We have already discussed him going to therapy to work out some of his anxieties, which he says he wants to work on, but that isn't so related to my biggest issue with him.

I want this relationship to work because it's so wonderful on so many levels. Any advice would be appreciated.