I don't know what to do.

I fear I have lost all my friends. I have no alternative for socialising.

I made a discord server. To be fair it has lasted for years. Which is an accomplishment within itself.

But a few core members either don't converse anymore or left. I know life moves on for others. And I don't expect anything, change-wise to have and subvert the situation overall.

And that is the problem. Once that all goes, I genuinely don't know what to do.

More people lurk than contribute and there is only 7 members.

Even then. Nobody seems fussed? Nobody seems to care? When I made my worries known.

Nothing happened. And i know I can't control anyone. I know i can't do anything. But i feel like I end up doing everything because no one does.

And because I am so desperate.

I fear, i am the only one checking in on others.

Conversing, contributing and sometimes I realise, I have been chatting to myself solid for a couple days.

Sometimes months will go by with nothing, if i don't contribute.

And it scares me.

I asked folk if something is wrong.

And maybe with me asking or my worries, they see it as some kind of pressure and avoid more.

I am not asking a lot at all. But it might come across like it because they're use to others doing more or doing things for them.

Almost like a learned helplessness.

I am understanding that people are all going through their own things, so am I.

But as a collective, as a group on a server.

Like in a friend group or social group, you've got to upkeep somehow, even if it is just one message every month or so.

Nothing fancy. But even that is too much to ask. Anything I do or say is too much. I am not strict, quite frankly there is very little rules or any rules even.

But i fear that's the problem, because it is so lax, nobody challenges each other, nobody tries anymore.

And the situation has regressed and regressed because they may believe someone else will do it.

Or maybe i am the shitty person.