15 months on mirtazapine: went to Vegas over the weekend and ate myself silly 2 days in a row. Questioning my current quality of life now

It was my first fine dining experiences. The first day we hit the Wynn buffet. The day after was Smith and Wollensky's steakhouse. I ate so much both times, I refluxed and nearly barfed. It was more borderline may or may not puke kinda sick at the buffet and more about literally overflowing at the steakhouse with practically no nausea there. I cannot recall the last time I'd been so freaking jam packed full. I absolutely committed the sin of gluttony in sin city 😂 I wasn't there very long or else I'd have kept searching for my limits :>

But I didn't use much extra zofran compared to normal. Factors that probably helped were walking a lot, being already very tolerant of vegetables and non mammalian meats, excitement, squeeze hormones in play from being at menstrual time but not yet starting, and fear of airplanes (my guts have declared there is a difference between fear and stress. Fear good, stress bad) I had some stomach cramps on the way to the airbnb that night after the afternoon buffet but that was probably gastrocolic reflex related. Motility is pain.

I've heard of people doing better when they move to places with better ingredients. I live in rural Arkansas in a borderline food desert. Because of their pledge to buy local as much as possible, our Walmart has a sparse selection of poor quality produce. I sometimes go far away to Little Rock to get Costco and Trader Joe's because I really like their produce. I didn't like dragonfruit until I had one from Costco because our Walmarts tasted like soap and pepper, that's how bad they can be. Even the bananas and sweet potatoes were wildly different. TJs has so many more fresh greens and seafoods to pick from. Kroger's private selection brand sugar free bread is so freaking good. We ain't got none of that here 😭 There are no sidewalks in my neighborhood and I'm multiple miles from anything that isn't houses, mechanics, and churches. Lots of stray dogs too.

If I need walking and higher quality food in order to thrive, I might have to reconsider my plans of moving to Grand Rapids, Michigan eventually. I was attracted by jobs over there but maybe I should try to go out west. If I go where everyone wants to be, that's where the top tier ingredients are most likely getting shipped.