choosing myself

maybe i was thinking myself my entire life. my beliefs, my expectations, my failures. the kind of person i’d be had i been just wiser and prettier. what was right and what was wrong for me. but i’m young and stupid. i thought of wrong people as the ones who loved me for me. their betrayal hurt me to the point that i ruined my life. i ruined my life because of what those people were doing. as much as i wanted to turn back the stupid time, i know i can’t.

i want to take the time to forgive myself and enjoy life again, so i’ve decided to leave everything behind. my beliefs, my expectations, my failures. everything. and if loneliness hits and i regret leaving, i’d just remember that staying would absolutely kill my soul, and that i’m just here to heal it and to live a gentle life.

i’d know.