Mental health

I’m struggling with guilt, there’s times I get frustrated and my tone changes and mom gets upset and ignores me.

I am so tired all day because now this is 24/7 care and usually I’m the only one here doing it. but once I lay down and I think of all the wrong things I did and what I could have done better I just break down.

When I initially found out about my moms disease I spent the weekends getting drunk and crying to my friends and seems like after a while they got tired of it. and honestly I can’t blame them but those comments have always been in the back of my mind.

I feel like my wall is so high up that I don’t talk about it to anyone. I can’t even bring myself to talk to a therapist.

this is my only form of therapy/venting.

I need help I just don’t know where to start, I don’t have medical insurance and I can’t really pay of out pocket for it.