I cheated on my boyfriend of 3 years and I think I’ll never find happiness ever again in my life.

Hi.

I was in a relationship with my absolutely beautiful thoughtful kind and loving boyfriend for 3 years and it was a seemingly perfect relationship where we were both madly in love and wanted to get married soon.

Our professional lives were a lot hectic and I got one had been holding him down and being a support for him for atleast 3 years. He had been my support too but his problems seemed to always be bigger than mine so I was the one doing the most in the relationship.Never made him feel like I wasn’t there for him or I wouldn’t help him solve his problems. Fair to say that I had been feeling a little exhausted.

When we both joined our new job role, I made sure to be there for him and take out time for him as much as possible but he wouldn’t do the same for me and say that his work was too much and he would not actively think about me cuz he was always buried with work. It was true to some extent but I felt him being very complacent in the relationship. Being too comfortable with me carrying the load. I was going through a lot at my work too. Then came a man who started making me feel seen and wanted at work and I ended up cheating on my boyfriend with him. The thing is I never wanted that affair to be anything and I wanted to end it asap but it went on for a little longer than it was supposed to and my boyfriend found out and rightfully left me.

It’s been a few months now but I can’t seem to take my boyfriend off my mind.

I love him and I feel like I’ll never be able to love another person. I don’t wanna be anybody’s wife but his. I wanna love only him. Nobody will ever take his place in my life and I live with that everyday and it kills me. I regret the affair with every ounce of my being and I can’t begin to describe how sorry I am.

Will I ever get over him and ready for anything else?

Am I always gonna feel like this?

Will I never feel happy again?

Anybody who has gone through something like this. Could you tell me if yall have found happiness later?