My wife is struggling to accept my sexual liberation and identity discovery. Am I being "controlled" by her boundaries?

Hi all, throwaway account but,

Background:

I (A) have been with my wife (B) for 17 years. Our marriage has had its struggles, including a brief affair I had 12 years ago, but we’ve stayed together. For the last 7-8 years of our marriage, I struggled with a very low libido, which I believe was due to my chronic depression, anxiety, and SSRI medication.

Nine months ago, we consentually opened our marriage to a throuple with C (a trans woman). Finding C has been a revelation for me. For the first time, I feel sexually "awake" and liberated. However, B and C broke up 4 months ago, and since then, B has been trying to impose strict boundaries on my relationship with C.

The Current Situation:

I am currently trying to maintain a relationship with both women (a "hinge" dynamic), but I feel constantly policed.

The "Abuse" Labels: Recently, C’s mental health worker and a GP have used the word "abusive" to describe my behavior. I believe this is a total misunderstanding of my "identity discovery."

The Memory Issue: C suffers from EUPD and memory loss. Sometimes we have arguments and she forgets the context, then assumes I am the "bad guy." I find it incredibly painful to be blamed for things she simply can't remember accurately.

The Sexual Tension: B wants to limit what I can do with C (e.g., only kissing/holding hands). When B imposes these "rules," I find it very hard to be sexually intimate with B. It’s not a punishment; it’s just that her control kills my desire. When things are "relaxed" and I feel supported in my liberation, my libido for B returns naturally.

Mental Health Struggles: I have told B that if I am forced to lose C or go back to a restrictive lifestyle, I will fall into a depression so deep I "may not survive." I’m not threatening her; I’m being honest about my mental state.

The Question:

I am trying to move at B’s pace, but I feel like her boundaries are actually a form of "weaponizing" my mental health against me. After B & C recently told me they think my behaviour is abusive I've become quiet because I don't feel I can trust them with my true feelings anymore after the intervention.

Am I the one being controlled here? Is it fair for B to limit my sexual liberation with C when it’s the only thing that's made me feel alive in years?

Thanks