Question for people who have quit for a long time

Hello everyone. I've been struggling with quitting, like most here. I usually get a few days without watching and then fall off the wagon before making a week. I know it's a process and I pick myself up every time, but I've also been trying to understand the reasons why I keep falling back, what hold does porn have on me... Obviously there are many reasons, but I understand that one of them is that I don't want to lose any sexual part of myself. One of the reasons I dabble(d) into porn is to explore my sexuality when I feel like I can't irl (even tho I understand it would probably be healthier), because those are not normal kinks (nothing ilegal nor physically harmful to anyone involved) and I'm not sure how would I integrate that in a relationship.

So I guess my question is, to all of you who have been living porn free for a long time, do you find ways outside of porn to keep exploring? If so, how? I understand that when quitting an addiction, there's no easy path and sacrifices have to be made. If there's a way to do this without sacrificing my weird sexual desires, I'd really like to know. If not, I should know that too I suppose. Either way, the path is to be clear of this addiction