I’m aroace and I lowkey think I might be in love with my best friend

I don’t really know what to do. The realization hit me like a truck and I don’t know how to feel especially after having identified as being aromantic asexual for such a long time and not really putting too much thought into my sexuality because of it.

Just. I don’t know what to do. This feeling is new and exciting and I just keep thinking about him. He’s always on my mind and he’s the reason I check my notifications all the time. I’m always looking for things I think he might like and when I come across something it’s nearly impossible for me not to want to share it with him. I can talk to him for hours and never get bored and even when conversations slow it’s okay and I’m always looking forward to our next conversation.

I want him to know everything about me and I want to know everything about him and so much more.

Just I really don’t know how you feel right now. I honestly don’t think I’ll ever tell him since I know this feeling will only last so long before I slip back into what feels like a different person’s mind and I just go back to seeing him as my best friend and nothing more and I don’t want to hurt him when that happens. The last thing I’d want to do is hurt him.

I just needed to get this off my chest and I’m sorry for posting it here but I just don’t feel comfortable posting this in other subs because I always see stuff like this “erm! That’s actually just straight but with extra steps!! 🤓👆” and I love him in an extremely gay way that’s difficult to describe. I’m a transmasculine nonbinary person and he’s a cis guy and it just feels so queer in all the right ways.

Yeah. Anyway, he mentioned the word “love” in my general direction and it’s got my heart hammering against my ribs.