37f with a 13.5 age gap to husband and suddenly feel weird about it.

We have been together since I was 25,I had already been married to someone 11 years older and split when I was 24. Exactly 12 months later my husband and I met.

We have 3 beautiful kids,he has always and still does treat me with so much care,love and kindness.

For context,the dynamic is I would say I wear the pants lol(I can't think of another words sorry!) and his previous long relationship was with his ex for ten years and similar age.

Suddenly over the last few weeks I have been feeling really strange and some weird feelings about our age gap,not so much our gap now but when I was 26.

Any idea why this is occurring?How to not let it grow massive in my head and become a much bigger problem?

We did argue a lot before kids,honestly mostly fuelled by my hot headed temper,I had abandonment issues that made me jealous..he maybe rightfully so would get angry back(never name call or be abusive

in any way) but I guess I look back and think gosh,I was so young ,so much trauma and at that time I now see I don't need fire thrown on a already very well lit fire. I guess I am feeling at the huge age gap he should have not dealt with it how he did.

Any advice at all would be greatly appreciated !