“May they dwell in equanimity, free from attachment and aversion to those near and far.”

I saw this as the fourth line in a four line prayer in which each of the four lines is said to correspond to one of the Four Immeasureables, the fourth being Equanimity

As I applied this line to various people in my life, I saw how secretly, unconsciously, I had been wishing the opposite. For example, an old friend, I had been secretly wishing they be attached to me. This was a secret desire proliferating within me, driving a lot of my actions. When I invited them in my mind to dwell in equanimity, free from attachment and aversion to those near and far, it almost felt like releasing a hook that had been attached to my heart, and reaching towards them with string and another hook.

I did not realize before I wanted them to be attached to me.

Something happened as well when I did this with an ex girlfriend in mind. It felt like true care. To wish for her to not be attached nor averse, and to dwell and equanimity. That takes me out of the equation, and empowers her to be an island where she can dwell safe, and alone.

I enjoy this practice, and I’m sharing it now, perhaps out of a secret desire to have others be attached to me or my words, but perhaps that’s for another day to purify