Venting about how toxic my ex was

I’m 29F. Hes 34M. We met at a rehab. I’m going to make a lists of pros and cons. Should I reach back out?

First, it’s important to know that he moved to another state, so we video chatted on FaceTime 24/7

Cons:

X He makes me wear a sweatshirt over my butt so no one else can see it. No tank tops allowed

X Everytime I spent time with my family, which was rare, he would text me, and if I didn’t text back fast enough (because were at the dinner table eating) he would say, “oh so you’re introducing your other boyfriend to your family” and then wouldnt respond to my texts or answer my phone calls when I got back home

X Every night I would go to sleep, he would accuse me of having a guy over. I would show him around the whole house. Eventually I put up two cameras. He would wake me up 4-6 times a night because “theres someone in the house. He even recorded me because I was s***ing someone’s d*** while I was sleeping. He sent me the recording only after saying to me, “how could you do that to me??? After everything we’ve been through??? You’re gonna make me f*** you up” I watched the recording, it was me, sleeping in bed, alone, all by myself, not even moving. At this point, I knew he was delusional.

X He apparently got in a bunch of arguements with all of his exes about how he knew they were cheating on him

X He would continuously talk about his ex

X he would never ask about how I’m doing

X he wanted to syat on FaceTime 24/7

X I wasn’t allowed to talk to my therapist unless he was on the phone with me because “anything you can tell him, you can tell me”

X Forced me into being Muslim

X Gaslighted me into doing a Muslim marriage with him

X Said he wasn’t back on drugs, but when I went to visit, saw drugs under his bed, and would hangout with his uncle who always did drugs

X Wouldnt allow me to talk to my friends unless he could hear the conversation

X always asked me to please him, but would NEVER please me

X he didn’t have a job, I did. Everytime I made money, he would ask me to buy him an iPad, iPhone, expensive camera, laptop, drone, etc. I never spent money on myself, and when I did, he said “dont spend money on things that your parents can buy you. Then, one time, when I didn’t have money, he asked for cigs. I told him I didn’t have money. He said, “well, if you didnt spend your money then you would have money to buy me cigarettes “ I said “ok well I don’t have any” a few hours pass by, he says “I got money from my friend, no thanks to you” I said “excuse you?? Do you know how many times I’ve helped you out?? His response was “well, that doesn’t help me now, now does it”

X I would always be the one to travel to him. When I arrived after a 10 hour train ride, I just wanted to sleep. What did he do when I arrived? Sat down on the bed, went on his phone, completely ignoring me. Then, he looked up and said, “will you suck my d***”. No asking how are you, how was your ride, are you okay? None of that. I told him I was tired and wanted to sleep. He said “you smell bad”

Seriously??

X If something didn’t go his way, he would refuse to talk to me.

X If I looked around my room, looking for something like a pen, he would think that I’m looking at a man in my room that I “snuck in”. I’ve never had anyone in my room, ever. Besides my sister.

X one time, I had my aunt and uncle over. We went out to eat. My aunt had a bad cough. When we got back home (btw, my ex was apparently still on FaceTime waiting for me to get back home), my aunt walks by my room and coughed. I walked in my room and I hear him say to me, “who was that man that just coughed inside your room???” I said, first of all, that was my aunt, she has a bad cough.” He said, “I know a man’s cough when I hear one, and why is there a man in your room???” I tried breaking up with him right then and there, but he gaslighted me into not hanging up the phone.

X he always threatened to break up

X I warned him about how I am when I PMS. He always got so defensive and argued with me, asking me “why are you so mad at me???” I said “I’m not mad at you, I’m PMSing and you’re the one that wants to stay on the phone 24/7 while I’m PMSing, I warned you.”

X he threatened to post my nudes on the internet after I left him”

X he always gaslights, manipulates, and is so toxic towards me

X he told me that I’m not allowed to eat after 6PM

X he is so selfish

X his aunt is allowing him to stay with her for free. She has 5 other kids that go to school. His aunt asked him to clean the bathroom while in school. His response? “Why can’t they clean it?? They’re the ones that live here. I shouldn’t have to clean it. I clean the dishes and mop the floor.” Are you serious right now??? She allows you to stay there for FREE, feeds you dinner EVERY NIGHT, allows her to eat HER food. You wash the dishes and mop the floors like twice a week, then started only doing it twice a month. I know because I’m on FaceTime with you 24/7, so why in the actual Hel are you complaining??

You know what he said when I broke up with him??? His only concern was, “I’m going to be homeless if you leave me”

Okay, and that’s my problem how???? I’ve been told you to get a job for a year straight.

Pros:

Leaving his dumb a**