MY PERSONAL RATING OF ALL 9TH DOCTOR AND 10TH DOCTOR EPISODES

This is how I rate all of these 4 series. It's 100% honest.

Get fucked, RTD!

SERIES 1

Rose - Too retro. Zero outta ten.

The End of the World - Cassandra wasn't sexy enough. Zero outta ten.

The Unquiet Dead - Couldn't keep my eyes open. Zero outta ten.

Aliens of London - Reminds me too much of modern politics. Zero outta ten.

World War Three - Expected an epic nuclear war between Americans and Commies, got more Slitheen crap instead. Zero outta ten.

Dalek - Lost my virginity while this was playing. The sex was bad. Zero outta ten.

The Long Game - The game was too long. Zero outta ten.

Father's Day - Too sentimental. Zero outta ten.

The Empty Child - My mummy died in a chemical plant accident when I was 7. Zero outta ten.

The Doctor Dances - There wasn't a 35-minute makeout scene between Jack and the Doctor. Zero outta ten.

Boom Town - Slitheen. Zero outta ten.

Bad Wolf - Mickey blows. Zero outta ten.

The Parting of the Ways - They brought back Jack but not Lynda Moss. Zero outta ten.

SERIES 2

The Christmas Invasion - Too much yapping from Jackie. Zero outta ten.

New Earth - The hospital didn't have a shop. Zero outta ten.

Tooth and Claw - I honestly don't remember this episode. Zero outta ten.

School Reunion - Anthony Stewart Head should've been the Doctor. Zero outta ten.

The Girl in the Fireplace - Fr*nch. Zero outta ten.

Rise of the Cybermen - John Lumic is what you get when you order Davros off Wish. Zero outta ten.

The Age of Steel - I hear Gareth remarried. Zero outta ten.

The Idiot's Lantern - The dad didn't die at the end. Zero outta ten.

The Impossible Planet/The Satan Pit - I honestly don't remember these episodes. I'll have to rewatch them sometime.

Love and Monsters - It fucking sucked. Zero outta ten.

Fear Her - It sucking fucked. Zero outta ten.

Army of Ghosts - Too much Cybermen, not enough Daleks. Zero outta ten.

Doomsday - Too much Daleks, not enough Cybermen. Zero outta ten.

SERIES 3

The Runaway Bride - Donna's fiance did nothing wrong. Zero outta ten.

Smith and Jones - Come on, just give us Matt Smith already! Zero outta ten.

The Shakespeare Code - The Doctor didn't like Martha because he's racist and only likes white blonde women. Cancelled. Zero outta ten.

Gridlock - Not enough angry conservatives crying about "the wokeness" of this one. Zero outta ten.

Daleks in Manhattan - Not enough deaths. Zero outta ten.

Evolution of the Daleks - Dalek Sec was fucking ugly. Zero outta ten.

The Lazarus Experiment - It was so bad I went back and rewatched Colin Baker's first episode to calm me down. Negative ten outta ten.

42 - Slept through it. Zero outta ten.

Human Nature - That alien guy reminds me of Harry Vanderspiegle. Zero outta ten.

The Family of Blood - Not bloody enough. Zero outta ten.

Blink - Overrated. Zero outta ten.

Utopia - The Daleks didn't show up for the finale. Zero outta ten.

The Sound of Drums - I was expecting a concert ending with the Master and the Doctor kissing passionately. Such wasted potential. Zero outta ten.

Last of the Time Lords - The ending fucking sucked. Zero outta ten.

SERIES 4 (Listen, I know the joke's getting tired by now, but just hold on for a bit longer, okay? It's almost over.)

Voyage of the Damned - The Doctor and Astrid didn't do the pose from Titanic. Zero outta ten.

Partners in Crime - Okay, seriously, I'm getting fucking tired of David Tennant. Zero outta ten.

The Fires of Pompeii - I wanna rail Peter Capaldi so badly. This episode reminds me that I can't. Zero outta ten.

Planet of the Ood - The Ood have 2 brains and they're still dumb as shit. Zero outta ten.

The Sontaran Stratagem - Stupid. Zero outta ten.

The Poison Sky - Climate change is a myth. Zero outta ten.

The Doctor's Daughter - This episode was the worst fucking thing I've ever seen in my entire life. If I go to hell, this episode is gonna be playing for all of eternity and I'll have to sit there and suffer in silence. Oh, wait, that wouldn't work, because I'd fall asleep five minutes in. Negative ten outta ten.

The Unicorn and the Wasp - There wasn't an actual unicorn. Zero outta ten.

Silence in the Library - We didn't get to hear the Doctor's name. Zero outta ten.

Forest of the Dead - I was expecting the Cybermen to show up. They didn't. Zero outta ten.

Midnight - 50 minutes of people screaming at each other and getting hysterical. If I wanna see that, I'll just go to my family dinner every Sunday. Zero outta ten.

Turn Left - Donna and Rose didn't passionately make out after meeting each other. Zero outta ten.

The Stolen Earth - Too many people whining, not enough Daleks. Zero outta ten.

Journey's End - Okay, what the fuck? David Tennant's still not gone? It's been three seasons, for christ's sake! Negative ten outta ten.

The End of Time - Finally, Matt Smith! Ten outta ten.