considering moving stables, an I overthinking it? Thoughts?

Hi everyone! For context, I’ve been riding on and off for 8 years now, and am still very inexperienced with a lot of things. I’m considering moving stables because the way my instructor teaches her lessons occasionally raises red flags in my head. She’s a decent instructor but she has a bit of a ‘show your horse you’re the boss, the horse is challenging you’ mentality, which makes me a bit sad because I initially moved barns hoping to escape that kind of training mindset. One time during a group lesson, I saw her bat a horse on the face with her hand , which disturbed me, and when I summoned up the courage to ask her why she did it, she said it was because the horse was intruding on her personal space. Which makes sense, I suppose, but my gut still felt bad about it because I’d seen another instructor at the barn do the same thing when a horse ‘misbehaved’. I know this old-school method of asserting authority over a horse is very common,but it could also just be my inexperience showing over a misunderstanding.I just want to be secure in the fact that I’m riding at a place that always puts the horse’s happiness first. And if I do move barns, would it be proper etiquette to ask them about their training philosophy? And how would I go about that? Any help is appreciated!

(Edit: I suffer from anxiety/ocd as well so that could also be a factor in my catastrophizing)