How did u release in your first time trying it on your own ??

Kk. This is embarassing but i genuinely need 3rd person's opinion.

So the thing is I can't release. I have never tried fing**ing but my boyfriend suggested I should. Well i couldn't release when he was. I have never been able to, ik I'm feeling it. But i can't release. So he suggested that I should try it as it might be making me frustrated. But... I couldn't even on my own. He thinks that it's not normal and i should be able to. And that I need to visit a doc(which ofc i can't—). But I feel like maybe it's coz I still live with my parents and am surrounded by them which is why I can't.

And he has been so instant these days. I feel like he feels like he is lacking something that I can't release. Or that I'm embarassed to tell him about such things, which ik i used to be, but not anymore.

So is this normal ? Or do I need help ?

And if... Well if u don't mind please give me some tips (⁠╯⁠︵⁠╰⁠,⁠).

I don't even know if I can post it here (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠).