25M splitting up with my GF, self chucking?

Been into sph since a teenager when my HS crush called me small. I consider myself bi as for a few years I just became a bottom as sex was easier to get and better. I’ve been with one woman since and I think I’m just scared to be lonely again. I love the thought of all girls I once knew moving on to bigger cocks and abandonining me, a bit like self imposed cuck.

I’m unsure on what to do, if I finally give In and live my life as a caged white boi with no prospects of future girlfriends? How do you all think you will be in your 40s? I’ve been with one woman and 54 men, I just get so horny thinking these alphas are doing all the fucking and I see why. Do I try to cuck myself with my future ex? I’ve always thought once they get bigger I can’t go back