Favoritism is ruining me and my sisters thin relationship

I f20 have an older sister f21 since birth we were polar opposites I was more quite and creative whilst she was more outgoing growing up with a single alcoholic mother she always told me and my sis to stay together and defend each other.

And so I took it very seriously if my sister were being talked down on I’d jump and so on in elementary I stated getting bullied in 2nd grade I’d told my mom and she told me to tell a teacher and nothing was done the bullying went up all the way to 5th grade by a teacher and like 2 different groups of girls and if it wasn’t obvious then yes my sister was also one of my bullies she’d act like I never existed and that I wasn’t even her sister one person even asked her once and she said to my face that she had no clue who I was.

Clearly that hurt cause I remember it we’d visit our aunts a lot and again I was being bullied by my sister and my cousins one day I’d gone crying to my mom because they had pushed me off the play set at the park and my sister just sat and watched my mom gave me a pep talk and didn’t even comment on anything.

Middle school was the same the bullying didn’t stop until I got into high school (now with anxiety AND depression cause of covid) I did my freshman year online and transferred to a different school for my 2nd year luckily it was a school with a strong art program and finally I made plenty of friends and my sister was alone though of course my mom told us to stick together so every dad at lunch I’d find where she’s sitting alone and introduce her to my friends and share any snacks or food I’d have that day with her but she’s always look at me strange or ignore me so then I’d leave

FINALLY she and I graduated a year apart she’d already been in college for awhile and I took a gap year cause low and behold my mom let my sister get a job junior year but wouldn’t let me get one till I graduated which was some bs cause she expected me to go straight to college with no money 🙄

More examples of this favoritism are the fact that I haven’t hung out with my parents for my birthday in 5 years for my 20th birthday 2 months ago I asked kindly if my mom would make breakfast not just for me but for everyone and she flipped out saying that I don’t need breakfast that I know how to cook and that I could do it by myself

I’ve got a friend date coming up cause I told one of my friends no one does anything with me for my birthday but now I don’t know if I’ll go cause of course we have to go deal with my sister cause she’s coming over for the week.

Meanwhile my sister is showered in gifts for something as small as a good grade or getting a boyfriend every time she comes back for college whether it be for a week or months all she has to do is mention she wants breakfast and my mom hops to do it then my mom keeps telling people I’m dirty and a bad child cause I don’t want too clean up after HER grown daughter who leaves a giant mess in our shared room every time she leaves back for college

THEN my sister asks for money quite a lot she’s once asked for 40 dollars so she could get two meals from Uber Eats and didn’t even finish half but I once asked her for $10 dollars when I was in trade school so I could by snacks cause the cafeteria was down she sent me five dollars….which I could do nothing with at the time and she was aware of this

I’m starting to get really irritated and a bit of a problem to myself I do nice things cause my mom always told me that I was a sweet child growing up and to be nice to those around me but now whenever I tell her I feel like someone has wronged me she’s the main going “well stop doing nice things for people!” And honestly I might just cause I don’t even know anymore then everyone’s gonna treat me like shit cause I don’t wanna be a carpet to walk on anymore🤷🏾‍♀️

(Sorry for any misspelling I’m emotional)