I really hate the words used to describe sex.

This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot as of recently. I really hate the numerous words that people use to describe sex. Some examples are: crack, smash, hit, crush, ruin, etc. To me, it just sounds inherently violent. Now yes, I know that everyone’s sex lives are very different from one another, and I’m sure that there’s some people out there that like having this type of language used on them, but I feel that especially when it’s men saying these types of words towards women with whom they share sexual encounters with, it just makes sex seem degrading, damaging, and violent.

I would like to clarify that I have never had sex before, but I know that if that IS something I want in my future, it will be with somebody whom I deeply trust and love, where sex would be viewed as “love making.” But, even for people who have sex more casually, I don’t think it’s a good thing to normalize this type of language. Even people in long term romantic relationships refer to sex as these things. I already really hate how porn especially has normalized violent sexual acts, like choking, slapping, hitting, hair yanking, etc. (If you are into more rough sexual stuff, then you do you, but it shouldn’t be the expected normal), and this type of language is only pushing that harmful message further.

Overall, I just think it’s really strange how people would casually use phrases like, “I wanna hit that… I wanna crack that… I’m gonna smash that.” Even if you aren’t in a romantic relationship with the person you are having sex with, they are still a human being who deserves to be treated with respect.

(As an added note, I also tried to post this on a sub meant for discussions relating to sex, and it got taken down for “being too sex negative and hateful.”)