18M dating coworker (18F), great in person but barely texts, how do I handle the difference in communication?

Me 18M and a coworker 18F, have been texting and talking back in forth since december, just before valentine’s day, i decided to tell her how i felt, it went kind of well as we are talking more in a romantic relationship way, but im a bit confused by her and i need advice before i ask her to be my girlfriend officially. We’ve gone out on dates, we’ve gone out with coworkers as a group and us alone before. We are close when together, touchy, etc. Problem is im an anxious avoidant type person, I unfortunately get really jealous, always want to talk to feel safe, and always want to feel secure, AND over think ALOT. She's not that. She does not text much, and will often leave me on delivered and read for hours if theres not a conversation thats needed. I am trying to work on it and have been talking to AI as a therapist (i know its not a good idea, but its all im comfortable with), and ive been trying to work on learning that its not necessary to talk all the time. Theres a couple problems I think I might have with our relationship. Shes an oversharer and she is very social, I am the opposite. In person, she talks to me and is touchy and I feel cared for and thats when I feel like she does like me alot. But whenever we aren't together, it feels extremely dry, sometimes we will have a good conversation after work in person, or hangout and go on a date during the day, and other times we will both be home, and Ill try and text her and have a conversation because I love talking to her, and she just doesnt seem to really try to talk to me. Sometimes Ill get lucky and we will have a conversation about our days, what happened, but it usually only lasts a short amount of time, and then if I don't ask a question or send a message that she NEEDS to respond to, ill just be left on delivered or read for hours, and she will just not text me at all, sometimes till the next day. This hurts me alot, and I don't know why because Im trying to help myself, and tell myself that this is fine, and its not a big deal, but I want to find out if I should be worried before I ask her to be my girlfriend officially because I do want something long term with her. Another issue is that she's had her fare share of freak guys (mainly work) go after her, shes was forced to kiss a coworker that LOVED her a couple months ago, and hes a giant liar (literally, pathologically a liar), he makes up stories about his life that he tells only two female coworkers around his age, and he also tries to use drugs to flirt with female coworkers. I know this kind of sounds made up, but I promise you guys the guy is real. Problem is he texts her and talks to her a decent amount, and im trying to get over it, and not let my overthinking get the best of me because I also dont want to be controlling (especially cause we arent official) and tell her she should stop talking to him. But hes told her some really weird stuff lately, like how he had a one night stand with a girl and how she was super tight, and a bunch of other really weird sexual details. Hes also really touchy and personal with the girls (especially mine), ive heard that he often accidentally touches their asses ALOT, and he like gets right up to their faces and whispers whenever he has something to say to them which to me seems really weird. Ive also confronted him, because hes also bruised my girl by hitting her with a metal table at work (which when i talked to him he lied and said that she admitted it was her fault and she ran into it), which after talking to her she freaked out saying she never said that and hes lying. She doesn't really like him, but she does hangout with him from time to time, and they text and he tries to hangout with her after work alot, but lately shes been telling him no. She alot of the time complains about having to hangout with him, but then still chooses to do it anyways, which confuses me alot. I like her alot, and I want it to work out, which is why im trying to work on myself, because even if im not the root cause of why I feel so weird, I know that my avoidant attachment issues need to be worked on since ive gone through a bad relationship where i was kind of cheated on by another coworker. Ive also picked up a habit of vaping and smoking that ive been trying to slow down and stop because Ive noticed after a week that Ive been using it to calm myself and try and get rid of my issues by drugs. Ever since ive met this girl, and ive been trying to work on myself, ive been extremely emotional, and its been a really hard process, I know theres alot in this message, I've got alot of things I need help with and need to work on, but I wanted to give the most amount of details so I can get the best advice, im sorry if this isnt how its supposed to be formatted or something for this subreddit. But i appreciate any help I can get, I desperately need it. Theres alot more to the story, but I could NOT fit it in this message without pissing more people off, so I apologize if some things are a bit vague. Ask questions if you have them please, I can certainly answer them.