The Redwood Ship [Part 16]

Day 28 at the Cabin

This was my last time seeing Otis, in two days my time here is over. Hearing that Boatswain Call was the best thing I ever could've asked for after recent events. I read back through that entry so many times trying to differentiate fact from hallucination, but I just couldn't handle it again. I carried all the groceries in this time, making short conversation with him as we went back and forth. We were both surprised to see the pantry was completely empty. He asked about it but I couldn't form the words. couldn't get things straight.

I just showed him the last entry I made. He can't read very well so he asked me to. After making a comment about my eyepatch, which gained a chuckle from him, I read out most of it. It wasn't very fun, saying out loud the actions which make me despise myself. He cringed when we reached the part with that thing using his voice, but there was this look in his eye that made me think he knew what I was talking about. Which unsettled me more because that would make it real. Otis asked a lot of questions as I read through everything. I was as honest as I could be.

Afterwards I told him my real name. I honestly didn't expect him to know me, but he lives here and everyone here knows what I did I guess. And he was still nice, that's a rare occurrence, he didn't even pity me. He just did that parental thing of asking if I was really taking care of myself, and I said usually. I know I have a lot to still work on, and he was understanding. It was nice.

He looked over my injuries and I had to tell him the blood in my tear ducts wasn't a super big deal. We prodded at my hand. It really didn't hurt that much anymore, but I did feel sick when he moved an alcohol wipe along the inside of my visible muscles. To keep my mind off of it, we swapped stories about stupid accidents we've had. I was surprised to find out I've hurt myself more than he has. Guess that's why he's so old. He was really interested when I told him this one story about a dog that dug its teeth into my leg. I was lucky to not get rabies, but my bone got some chips taken out of it. I didn't do anything to the dog, to be clear, I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Story of my life.

Anyway after he left, which was a little around noon, I cleaned up. That's when I finally noticed it. Where that big guy had landed some planks had come loose and there it was. The captain's quarters. I could see the door through the gap left behind. I couldn't deny it anymore, I could see it and I was pretty sure I was perfectly in my right mind. I'm in the bedroom now, sitting on the bed, and every now and then I glance at the door. There's tapping on the other side. Hampton is sat up on the dresser. I managed to mess up his books and stuff after I threw it, made me feel bad and I did apologize. I just had to.

Anyone who actually reads this newspaper is gonna know who I am, fake name or not. I'm not ready for that. Then everyone will be right about me. But my friends won't think less of me. Mom won't think less of me. Sure, I'll accept it. I am my father's son. And now, I'm going to find out what's in the captain's quarters.

"And it's a Heave Ho, batten down the Captain's soul. Hoist myself upon the flagpole and wait for dear Devil Jones to take me home."

It was empty. Just a ghost of what it once was. Desk, bookshelves, chairs, all empty. I will tell the guys who own the ship the damage was caused by lightning and they will fix it and nobody will go in there again. But it just does not feel right. Like I saw nothing yet something at the same time. That is not possible though, is it? At the end of the day, what do I know as possible or not? I leave in two days, I know that. And I know I want to drink, luckily Otis brought up some new sodas.

Not much else happened today. I kept waiting for some bullshit to come knocking at my door. Nothing. Honestly, I'm glad. If this could keep up for like 48 more hours I can finally get home. God, never thought I'd miss home or college so much. Well, til next time which will be my last time.