Has anyone ever stayed with a partner who has recovered from being the aggressor of DV?

I-27w have been in a relationship for almost 10 years a with my 29m boyfriend. When I first met him I was 17 years old and I had just started my first job at Walmart as a cashier. We ended up doing oral during that summer and texting and what not. I was in the process of getting out of a relationship with a 21-year-old who had been stalking me and followed me to uni. The man I was in a relationship with at the time was threatening to end his life and my current partner had explained to me that this was not right and advised me to end the relationship. The partner I was with at a time would not take no for an answer. He continued to message my friends and came up with excuses lying about his mother having cancer and needing to reach out to me and what not. It really f***** with my head. My partner at the time sent me a message via Snapchat saying that he" f***** on Rez f*** you b****". My response was an immediate apology. He ended up saying that he thought that I was leading him on because I didn't have time to hang out with him. I was a Premier dancer for Highland dancing and working part-time job as well to save for school as I was paying for it myself. During my first year of VNE when I started dating my current partner it was super sexual and really toxic. I was definitely influenced mine, a past partner and very insecure. Constantly asking him for reassurance if he was cheating on me. And he would do things that would make me question. His loyalty like getting naked at party's in front of other women and doing cocaine and what not and me finding out from his friends who got something out of me not knowing. After I finished my 4 years who just lost his job? Told me that he was going to move back to his mom's house after covid struck. My final year of university had ended abruptly and I was unable to pay for my full month of rent with the part-time job that I was at. So I took my partner up when he offered me to move in with his mother. His mother had a history of entering my apartment and shaming me for the condition what it was in. She would scold me if there were dishes that weren't done as well as my partner would call her to shame me in front of her if I wasn't doing enough for him around the house. Reflecting on this now. I know that it was the wrong choice for me to have moved in with her but at the time I was 19 and super naive. I ended up living with them both for 5 years and at first I was doing lots of work around the house and landscaping for her and she had complete control over our lives, controlling what we did, what we ate, etc. And then I decided after my grandma died and I got some inheritance to go back to school and so I did a graduate certificate while I was living at her house. I continued to work for her and what not around her house during this time. She's a very wealthy woman, who's a millionaire. During this time my partner would get into really loud arguments with her. I would completely lock up because it would bring me back to the arguments I had with him in our first and second apartment. Our first apartment. He would throw my phone pin me against walls and scream at me all hours of the night until I was deprived of enough sleep. I felt like I was dissociated and hallucinating. In our second apartment it got more physical. Him punching me and leaving bruises, him threatening to kill himself and myself with a knife, me locking myself in the bathroom and him trying to get into her harm me. I know reading this now you're probably thinking it's my fault and that I should have left. There's a part of me that also believes that but at the same time I know I wasn't ready. After I finish my graduate certificate while I was living with him and his mother, I ended up getting a placement and I finally ended up feeling a sense of normality and purpose outside of the relationship. With time I ended up getting a job within the placement that I had. The violence continued with my partner, at some points. Him kicking me out of the house and me having to spend a week at my parents house after being beaten physically and then me moving back in. In his mom ended up hating me because he would originally start really aggressive fights with her to defend me and then eventually he learns that he could get on her good side by being aggressive towards me and blaming me for every problem in both of their lives. In August of 2025 I decided it didn't matter how much money I saved up and I decided to get an apartment on my own. He had also requested this and after I got an apartment my therapist had told me that I would be able to set some boundaries myself. A night came where he end it up. Throwing food I had made him at my face. I finally had the safety of my own place that I asked that he leave. He refused and told me he was going to sleep outside of my room on the couch. I didn't feel safe about this so I told him I would call him a taxi. He refused and I told him that the next step would be that I would call the police he dared me to. I ended up calling the police and he ran out of there and paid for his own taxi back to his mother's house. We ended up not speaking for several days and he had told me that he was done. I heard heard this before and I messaged him again and asked for some clarity and he told me to interpret the words he as he had shared them. I ended up grieving our relationship and within a few days past that he ended up reaching out and saying that he didn't mean it. I ended up holding him accountable to his word and told him that I didn't like him gaslighting me and playing with my head as to whether he was breaking up with me or not. At Christmas he ended up getting me another promise ring and asked me to be his girlfriend again. I felt conflicted but I agreed to do so because at the end of the day I feel associated and I don't even know what's real. I told him this and was completely transparent. I don't know if it was the right thing to do. His mom hates me and he's going on a trip next week. Their family is incredibly wealthy and she is bringing everyone except for me on the trip. I don't expect to go, but my partner had assumed that I was going when she had shared this with the family. She ended up saying that she only had four tickets for herself, my boy friend, his brother and his brother's girlfriend. My boyfriend said that he had asked about me and she said that she made four tickets with her vacation package. He ended up telling me that he had offered today for me go and she told me that it would be up to me to pay and she encouraged him not to pay for it. I feel like she doesn't want me and her family. She's used me as a scapegoat before while we were living together and told him when he would get aggressive with her that he knew it wasn't coming from her and would try and blame me. There's a part of me that doesn't feel real and saying all this. I feel like I'm not even conveying myself properly, but I hope that there's a few of you that understand. I now have an apartment on my own after he kicked me out but even having it for 6 months on my own. I'm still with him and I don't know what to do.