How my school destroyed me

As I said in title . I was always a bright kid . I qualified all competitive exam till class 10th and got scholarship. Being a lower middle class , yk how parents wants to get minimum expenses in everything. I joined navodaya , it was my biggest mistake . I couldn't make it in class 6th. Went in class 8th . I couldn't make friends their. Then lockdown came so I didn't had to go to school in 9th and 10th . Then again after sometime, few months of 10th were left for which they called us . So we went . That place was like fittest will survive which I never was . I couldn't make friends that made feel left out. The worst habits of navodaya students were they will be your friends and then they will talk behind your back and change friends in every class or in few months . I was so alone there it started eating me . And then class 11th came , i didn't want to go. I wanted to take a dummy school and then take coaching for neet ( I had secured some scholarship from pw , akash , local coaching ) . But my parents said let's see first you complete 11th 12th from jnv it is a very good place . I have already told them how bad I feels there they said it must be your fault why no one wants to be friend with you . How can it my fault . I went there late , they had already made their circle . And in all my previous school I had good friends . and in 11th i went through depression from summer vacations before even 11th start , lost 10 kg weight . After going school I was going more depressed. Which made me studying nothing in whole 11th . And after that 12th I had scored so much less mark . Which made me more depressed , in my first drop my parents said online se karlo . I said okay because I wasn't ready to make friends , or to go new places ,but that year I could not study anything. Nothing went through health issues , family problems . Now it's my second drop year , I still regret choosing navodaya and how it destroyed my life . Maybe no body goes through all that which I had gone because it was so much even I couldn't write . I still get nightmares from that school . Now my old school friends thinks I would do something big and they also say me tera kuch bada sa plan hoga . I feel ashamed. When I said my 12th percentage to them they didn't believe . Said kyun jhut bol rahi hai