In desperate need of help.

-Hello everyone, I (20s) could say i am addicted to pornography, everytime i tell myself i will quit i get right back into it after only few days, the longest i have stayed Porn free was only four days, and i went crazy during that period, i was exposed to pornography at only six years old, but it didnt have such a strong effect as it has on me now, during the past six years i have abandoned so many of my hobbies, isolated myself from friends and family, did not find meaning in staying around people, but to lock myself in a room and watch, video after video, sometimes i even find videos i have already watched in different platforms, when i get bored i switch to those ai bots apps like character ai, chai etc... (as corny as it sounds) instead of actually investing that energy to seek help, and everytime i feel guilty about it, guilty for staying up late, guilty for turning down invitations, events, or not socializing enough.

-I am exhausted , i want my creativity back, i neglected my studies, my social life, my hobbies and so many things, wasted days doing nothing but watch those videos, all im asking is advice, i needed to let this out of my chest because i am tired of relapsing everytime i promise myself i will quit.

-I just want to feel alive again.