r/Advice•
brad_online

My brother asked to move in with me - how do I say no?

Hi everyone! My brother (25M) has just asked to move in with me and my husband. He currently lives with a friend who has asked him to leave because the friends SO is moving in and they do not want a roommate. So my brother has asked if he can live with me for a couple of months while he saves up for his own place.

I want to help him, but im very concerned that if he moves in, he will never move out. He refuses to get a job and relies on gigwork such as Uber and doordash for income. He's often behind on rent and is frequently asking around for help paying bills, and that is when he is splitting an apartment. I cant imagine that he will qualify for an apartment on his own without an actual job, and I refuse to cosign for an apartment with him.

I want to say something like, "I cant do anything long term like moving in, but if you need a place to crash for a week or two after you've signed for an apartment and are waiting for move in day, that would be fine". I just feel bad. This brother has stayed with me a couple of times for a week or two each time, and i have said that my home would be always open to them. I meant for a short term stay like previous stays, but I think he took it as I would let him live with me.

Any advice on how to handle this??

Posted Mar 6, 2026, 3:49 PM UTC

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