To the poor soul on Buried City

Server: North America

Settings: Solo, PC, Cross platform enabled

Time / Date: March 6, 9:08 am PST

Map: Buried City

Conditions: Sun

You, with the survivor augment, just trying to make it to the exfil train, slithering ever so slowly in the train station like your life depended on it (because it did); me, trying to make it out with my Leaper Pulse Units and Humidifiers intact.

As I went down the stairs, I was happily greeted by a pop and a fireball. Being a child of the 80s, I simply slid down the stairs, unleashing all the inner Cool Guy energy that once freely gushed out of my now decrepit veins. Then I saw you, crawling. I thought of the defib in my inventory, how I could save you, how we could be friends for a brief moment in time, starting the weekend off right.

That was before the pop scream, the explosion.

Nothing was the same after you screamed "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!!". I knew it was over for us. Your lifeless body was now on fire, naturally, as I destroyed every robot in sight. It felt cruel, but I chuckled as I lifted every valuable off of your body, as the universe always seems to weave a thread of comedy in these kinds of tragedies. Thank you for the Renegade IV and your other valuables, please know they were not lost in vain.

While I cannot return your valuables—the Speranza black market has already consumed those whole, sadly—if you ever cross paths with hellacutty#0504—your weapon can definitely be saved and returned.

Godspeed, and good luck.