I am at my wits fucking end with the nhs

Going to the GP for insomnia tell me how tf their only advice is “have you tried going to bed earlier”?! Have I tried going to bed earlier?! Fuck you! Have you tried doing your job? Have you tried listening to your patient? Have you tried putting away that stupid bs patronising voice?

I go to bed at 10:30 and that’s perfectly fucking reasonable. I get to sleep at two thirty, and I still would whatever time I went to bed, it’s just whether I toss and turn like a rotisserie chicken for five hours or six.

But even if that was how it worked what then? What time is a reasonable time to fall asleep at? 10:30 like I’d like? Let’s do the math on that one. 2:30 to 10:30 is four hours. FOUR HOURS?! Fuck you! You want me to go to bed at SIX FUCKING THIRTY? What the FUCK have I done at SIX THIRTY. IVE BARELY EATEN MY DINNER AT SIX THIRTY! I DONT GO TO BED AT SIX THIRTY BECAUSE IM NOT THREE AND IM NOT NINETY.

“Looks like you’re getting about ten hours sleep” yeah because I’ve CANCELLED ALL MY COMMITMENTS THAT HAPPEN BEFORE 1PM. You think that’s reasonable?! I’m no longer in full time college because of this! I’ve missed appointments because of this!

“What have you tried” yeah let’s go through this for the MILLIONTH POINTLESS FUCKING TIME what have I TRIED?! What have I TRIED?! What HAVENT I tried?! I’ve tried EVERYTHING outside of prescription medication so doctor doctor prescribe me some fucking melatonin but you WONT because only CAHMS can do that apparently. Prescribe me something else but you WONT because the nhs doesn’t do SHIT when you need them to, so what the fuck am I paying taxes for?! To not be prescribed something when I’m sobbing my fucking eyes out to the apathetic cheapskate GP that’s just trying to save the nhs some fucking money? Because the dickheads in power are slowly cutting their funding to try and make it shit so nobody complains when the uk inevitably goes private? fuck you.

And I am FOREVER grateful that I didn’t have to take out a second mortgage to be patronised one too many times but OH MY GOD. They are so useless and unreliable and I don’t know how to make them listen! I am slowly going insane because NEED these meds. So rob a pharmacy or hit me over the head with a fucking sledgehammer I don’t give a FUCK because tell me why I didn’t get to sleep until 7am last night?! NHS fix because I am so past sick of it.