Tailscale scares me more than opening ports on my firewall

Over the years I have seen a lot of forums posts where homelabbers are admonished for self-hosting their remote access VPN and public services from their own public IP address(es). The criticism usually goes something like this: "I have 0 ports open on my firewall. Everything routes through Tailscale. They are a security and privacy focused company run by real security professionals who can offer you exponentially more protection than anything you could do on your own. You should never open ports on your own gateway as it's not a matter of 'if', but 'when' your network will be compromised."

I have a few problems with these die-hard advocates of Tailscale:

1. One of the main purposes of self-hosting is less reliance on the public cloud. Homelabbers essentially create their own private clouds. Wrapping them up in a public cloud-provider bow at the end kind of defeats the purpose. What happens when that free plan suddenly demands payment? Now you've been tricked into an ecosystem you didn't want to be dependent on.
2. Cloud providers are not immune to hacking and data leaks. This includes Tailscale. This leads me into my third and most important point:
3. Tailscale is a MUCH larger target to hackers than your residential IP. For all the state-of-the-art security implemented by Tailscale, there is an ever escalating war going on between them and cybercriminals. They have and will suffer security incidents that leak user data.

I am of the opinion that limiting the spotlight on your network is more important than the benefits gained from cloud provider-offered security systems. Even using a solid, open-source firewall like pfSense, OPNsense, or OpenWRT paired with a good reverse proxy gives me so much more peace of mind than the impending doom of public cloud compromise. There is also strength in having a dynamic IP address paired with DDNS that means your network moves across the Internet and is not tied to a single IP.

What are your thoughts regarding this debate? I am not saying that these offerings do not have their places; a service like Cloudflare's DNS proxy is a great addition to your own security policies. I am simply saying that it is wrong to assume that someone's network is "less secure" because they are responsible for it themselves. Personally, if my network gets hacked I want it to be no one else's fault but my own.