I need to stop bottling it up…….

I’m 18f and I’ve been raped and assaulted more times than I can count, I was molested by a cousin growing up that went on for multiple years, at 13 I got with my ex bf who was multiple years older than me and I was guilted into almost weekly sex for nearly 4 fucking years. I went to the psych ward after we broke up and it happened again there by one of the staff. The last 5 years of my life broke me in ways I will never recover from, recently my dad made a horrible comparison and basically said rape was no different than being forced to get a vaccine and I was disgusted by the comparison.

He knows how broken I am and how badly I’ve been affected and yet he still thought it was a good idea to say that in front of me and fucking doubled down by saying he knows what it’s like to be in my shoes because he was forced to get a vaccine. I’m angry I’m disgusted I don’t know what to do with these emotions but I can’t bottle them up anymore I just can’t…..