r/AITAH•
ItzELECTR0

AITAH for getting mad at my friend over his religion?

My best friend is one I met online. We've known each other for over 5 years now and we've been through thick and thin. Through the best and worst periods of our lives we've gone through them pretty much side by side, even though we're thousands of miles apart. I don't have many other friends, so I cherish the ones I do have very much. This one more than others.

I am a Christian living in Europe, and he is a Muslim living in Africa. We both speak really good English so that's how and why we understood each other pretty well. We never really cared about each other's religion.

Today I wanted to show my friend a music video which was really inspirational to me with a great message that I wanted to get my friend's reaction to. I've shown him one from the same artist before and he said he liked it.

He agreed to watch but he said he'd only be watching the visuals without any audio. I asked him why and he said it's because he quit music. He also said that a while ago but I thought he meant he didn't really listen to music much anymore. He also said didn't listen to the previous music video either, and only watched the visuals, when both of these clips only come together when both video and audio are experienced. That started an argument, not very heated at first, because we often have mild arguments about random things so it's not out of the usual for us. The argument basically revolved in me trying to convince him to also listen to the audio of the video, but it quickly devolved as the subject turned from those 2 clips specifically to music in general.

I myself absolutely love music. I am a very creative person and write a lot in my free time. In my writings folder I already have enough for 3 albums and then some. I love what I write and hope to release some of it some day, but that isn't the point. I was trying to understand what he meant by "quit music" as I initially just thought he meant he doesn't really listen to music anymore and I was trying to make the argument that it's just one music video I wasn't forcing him to listen to it every day or something. He then explained to me that by "quitting music" he meant altogether, because, in his words, his religion didn't allow it. I am not familiar with what being a Muslim implies, as I'm not very knowledgeable in Christianity either. I believe in God, but that's about it when it comes to me and religion. I don't go to church and I don't read the Bible.

From what I understood from him in the moment, listening to music is a sin for him? I am still unsure to what this implies, but he absolutely refuses to listen any kind of music. We fought and debated over the reasons and implications of this. It got really heated in no time. By the end, I gave him an ultimatum.

I asked him this question: "What if I was the one who made the music? Would you listen?"

He said that if his own mother made music, he wouldn't listen.

I then asked him if I had an album that I was working on for a very long time, and I released it tomorrow. Would he listen to that? He started repeating the previous answer he just gave me.

I cut him off and said "What if I put my heart and soul, my blood, sweat and tears into it?"

His exact words were: "It's nothing personal-"

He was probably going to continue speaking, but that's when I left the call. In my eyes, it was as personal as it got. Because as I've said, I really love music. It's one of the few things in life that make me happy. What he said really hurt me. If I was in a situation where my best friend made something that he put his heart into, that he loved to do and wanted to share it with me, but my religion viewed it as a sin and prohibited me from indulging in his creation, I would reject my religion. That would not stop me from believing in God, but it would stop me from believing in the way my religion wants me to.

Am I the asshole in thinking that way and for getting mad at him and fighting him about it?

Posted Mar 8, 2026, 1:15 PM UTC

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