Imagining from a hospital bed

In the sunlight that passed through the grimey window, the dust looked like flakes of gold floating gently on an invisible stream. It was a small slice of what I imagined heaven would look like. Golden. Serene. Painless. And from my bed, all I could do was imagine. When the tedious but well- meaning small talk of the nurses, and the slowly evaporating puddle of vistors began to bore me, I closed my eyes and imagined. Rain drops against the pane became a thunderous stampede of wild horses thudding against a glass plain. The dull buzzing of the lights became the electric humming of some contemplating giant, pondering his horde. In the absence of entertainment, you tend to make your own. Strangely enough, it was during on of these instances that Maggie entered the room.

She was a tall, slightly overweight, trainee nurse. Her eyes were of dew-covered grass, sharp, and her hair was entangled in itself, like a thorn bush. My heart skipped a beat.

"Good morning" she chirped. I nodded, letting her know that I wished the same.

Her eyebrow rose as her voice maintained the chirpy tones "I am just waiting on nurse Majella, she shouldn't be a moment"

I nodded once more.

"While we wait, is there anything I can get you?"

I shook my head side to side.

"Where did you put your tablet,silly?"

Internally, I shot back "I'm nineteen, if you're going to call me silly at least follow it up with a noun. Silly prick, silly cunt, silly bastard. Any of these are applicable and a little more age appropiate than plain old 'silly'".

Grunting and pointing, I notioned toward the floor.

"Oh" a faux exclaimation "how did that get there?"

She closed the door behind her and, turning around, theatrically curled her arms upwards, her wrists facing upwards, as if to mimic a sterotypical bimbo. She pranced toward the tablet, and dispite the extra effort, she ensured she had her back to me as she turned to pick it up from the floor.

Her rear was of a wide variety, hinting of an allure that may have existed before she had decided to return to college. It was pressed tightly against the nurse's uniform, tightly enough to notice that there was nothing between her flesh and the fabric. She tauntingly moved her hips.

"So difficult to pick this up from the floor" her voice maintained a level of chirpiness, but a hint of malice had slipped in.

She suddenly shot her face around, her eyes shooting piercing a piercing, mocking stare.

"Oh" She spoke slowly, now securing the tablet with no difficulty. "Enjoying the show?"

A panicked thudding began in my chest, as I shook my head, desperately trying to deny it.

"It's okay silly" she put the tablet by the bedside table and sat by me. "It's only natural" her cheeks rose, revealing a row of white teeth. Teeth that were highlighted by the bright red lipstick I just noticed.

Her hand touched the top of the blanket, as she scooted herself closer. "You must be so tense" her voice was a sultry coo "stroke victim, who can't even stroke his tension away?"

My eyes darted left to right, my fingers rose in the only defence I could muster.

"It's okay" Maggie stood up and leaned over me, her hand reaching beneath the sheets. "It's only natural" Her cold hand slipped beneath the seam of my boxers. She squeezed my testicles, sending shoots of pain through me. Her fingers pinched at my member, false nails scraped along my skin.

Aginst the pain I closed my eyes and imagined. I pictured the birds that exist only in fleeting miliseconds as they pass my window. I pictured that their entire existence was that, and that for that small amount of God-given time, as the wind brushed past them, ruffling their feathers at unfathomable speed, that they were happy. That they were unconcerned about the world, its problems. About their wellbeing, or even their own problems. That they were free.

She leaned closer and bit my lip playfully. She withdrew her hand and with inserted a finger in my mouth. "Oh, Silly" she whispered "it's only natural"

She stood up, and after rearranging the bed, examined the vase of dead flowers that rested by the bedside.

"We can't forget the dangers of screen time" she smiled widely as she picked up my tablet, and turning the charging port upward, expertly poured, as if practised, water into it. The screen quickly came on, a icon of a droplet of water dominated the screen. She placed both vase and tablet beside one another on the bedside table.

"Okay, Silly" she clapped her hands "I'll let Majella know that you're A-OK, and that you are ready for further treatment" She skipped toward the door "See you on night shift" she spoke as the door clicked behind her.

I sighed, feeling my heart drop, and tears form. I looked to the window and imagined.

In the sunlight that passed through the grimey window, the dust now looked like flakes of skin floating gently on an invisible stream, peeling from some rotten, drowned thing.