“How was your day?☀️”

I was in a complicated situationship for about 3.5 years. It was emotionally and sexually intense, but never stable and never had a clear future.

Last August I sent him a long message (as always) saying that I still had strong feelings for him but it was becoming very hard for me because I could see there was no future. He said he understood, that he also knew it was a dead end, and that he still had feelings for me. We chatted casually for about ten days and then we both stopped talking. That was our first big break and it lasted two months.

During those two months I was grieving and processing everything. After that, we unexpectedly met abroad on a work trip. The first thing he texted me was “you’re beautiful.” The next night we were out with friends and he tried to grab my ass after two months of silence (!!!). I felt really disappointed and confused by that.

After that we stopped talking again for about a month. Then there were a few weeks of casual chatting.

Then again, another one month of silence.

One night he sent a message saying he missed me a lot. I saw the notification but didn’t open it immediately, and after about 10 hours he deleted the message. I asked him if he changed his mind, he said no and and we started chatting again for a couple of weeks.

During that time he asked me one evening if I wanted to meet in two hours. I couldn’t because I had plans and wasn’t feeling well. I suggested another time. He never asked again. Neither did I.

Then another month of silence.

Later we met again at an event. This time I initiated contact because I missed him. We texted that night and the next morning he said good morning and told me I looked beautiful. I told him that texting can be confusing for me and that I would prefer to meet in person. He said that was his intention.

Two days later I asked if he wanted to meet that day. He read the message 5 hours later asking where I was, but by then I had already continued with my day.

After that he started texting almost daily but only casually, like “hey” or small talk. A week passed like that and he still didn’t ask to meet. One night he texted “hey”, I said “hey”, and that was the whole conversation.

I tried one more time and invited him to a bar. Again he replied hours later with only a comment about the bar but ignored the invitation.

The next morning he texted “good morning”. I was frustrated and didn’t reply. Three days later I felt guilty and explained that the reason I reached out was because I missed him and wanted to see him, but I felt things weren’t moving forward so I stepped back. I also said I didn’t want to disappear without saying why.

His reply was: “You did well telling me. How was your day?”

That response made me feel like everything I said was completely dismissed. I didn’t reply and we haven’t spoken since. It’s been about a month now.

I feel sad, angry, guilty, and mostly confused. We haven’t met alone in 7 months. I’m struggling with the lack of closure and the feeling that something meaningful just dissolved into silence.

How do you move on from something like this?