How to actually come to terms with being trans and live at peace

I want top surgery so badly, but nobody around me supports it. Everyone keeps telling me to wait or that I might regret it. After hearing that over and over, I’ve started doubting myself too. Sometimes I feel like I’m faking being trans, even though the dysphoria is very real.

The hardest part is accepting that I’m not a cis guy. That’s what I wish I was more than anything, and it hurts knowing that’s not my reality.

I’m also about to start figure skating, which I’m excited about, but it’s very divided into male and female skaters. I really don’t want to be seen as a female skater, and that thought has been weighing on me a lot.

Has anyone else struggled with this? The doubt, the dysphoria, and trying to accept being trans when part of you still wishes you were just cis?