Feeling broken and unlovable

Please give me advice on how to recover from this, I’m really struggling to put together the pieces and move forward.

My boyfriend and I were officially together for 11 months. About 6 months in, he had told me that he wanted to know about my past and wanted to support me. I felt safer with him than I had felt with anybody else, so I told him I was assaulted when I was younger (14) and it led me to getting into a verbally abusive relationship prior to getting with my boyfriend, when I was 22. The relationship my boyfriend and I had was perfect to me, we got along so well, and I had no issues with him. This past week I had been feeling off, so I called him a couple of time and asked if everything was ok, to which he said yes every time. He spends a lot of time with his friends so I didn't see him all last week, as he was with them everyday. Eventually he told me he was coming to see me a couple of days ago, and he told me that my past trauma was too much for him to handle. He said he had been really struggling to deal with it and has thought of it every day since I told him. This made me so unbelievably sad, I felt so strong for having made it through trauma and trusting a man again, only to be completely blind sighted by this. I feel so awful for telling him. He then went on to say I had no self respect for being in the relationship with the verbally abusive man, and that I should've left him sooner. He told me he would work on himself in hopes of us being together again, then the very next day after our breakup, he started following an only fans model. I can give more details on the relationship but this completely blind sighted me as I felt so safe and bonded with this person.