Thoughts on confidence?

Super clichéd, but I recently realised how important confidence is for making most things happen in life.

I've experimented with being more confident recently, and I've seen amazing changes so far. People really buy into perception more than reality.

I didn't notice how much my lack of confidence was impacting my life until I started experimenting with being more confident.

I realised I never developed any self-confidence because of my overtly domineering parents. I picked up a nasty habit of asking permission to do almost anything at home. Even the smallest acts of self-expression, like opening doors or turning on lights, were always met with abuse. I learned to become vigilant about everything, and it stuck with me into adulthood. For a long time, I felt like I needed permission to be the person I wanted to be, to have the life and career I wanted. This passiveness was getting me nowhere fast.

After a couple of weeks of experimenting with confidence, my nervous system caught up with me - it absolutely hated that I was now owning things I'd usually remain passive towards, or try to hide. I ended up crashing pretty hard, spent a week isolating, forgetting to eat and clean some days, and my sleep schedule was obliterated.

Doing better now after some rest and grieving.

I wanted to write this to hopefully inspire people to revisit confidence in their healing journey. It's a deep wound I wonder if other people share?