Update : My boyfriend finally told me the truth

Hi everybody ! I (HLF, 25) made a post about the complicated state of my relationship a couple month ago. Basically, after years of a declining sex life following a miscarriage, my boyfriend (LLM, 26) finally told me that sex really wasn’t that important to him and that he could go without. I was heartbroken when it happened, especially since we were in our way to be legally bonded together. Well, a lot has changed since then.

First, I would like to thank everyone for the kind words and the good advice provided, it helped us very much. I told him about the post and he wasn’t angry with me. We talked a lot, we both cried together and we came to a better understanding of one another. On the one hand, he realised how selfish it he had been in hiding such an important thing from me. On the other hand, I put myself in his shoes and also came to the conclusion that I was putting him under too much pressure. He also told me that he couldn’t go his whole life without sex but he just panicked and answered that when I asked him about it. He struggles a lot with communicating his feelings when under stress which probably stems from his childhood and his relationship with his parents (but I won’t get into that because it is not my story to tell).

We took a step back from everything but still got legally tied together. I was very busy with my studies so sex wasn’t on my mind at the time. I however still made a couple changes in my physical appearance that I thought would please him. For instance, I wore makeup more often (which I don’t usually do since I have little time to) and surprised him with a full body wax. The holidays came around and to my surprise, we have been intimate more times than I can count since the new year started. Most of the time, he initiates too. It’s been wonderful. We’ve even tried things we never did before !

I think that his job was actually stressing him out and the time of together really helped. We talked and we both agree that he will change position after our summer vacation. I will try to keep up the efforts on my side too, wearing cute clothes around the house and going out more often with him. I know that’s our struggles might return someday but for now, I really enjoy our healthy sex life together and hope it will go on. Thank you again for your kindness everyone !

xx