Finding a real personality

I have bpd and I have stopped and shut down any romantic advances from anybody for the past few months. Slowly, Im going back into finding a partner with people but I realized immediately how much I can change about myself. I always wished to travel and go out and be child free yet when a man or even a woman tells me they dont have those same desires, instead of accepting we aren’t compatible, I immediately change my dreams for them.

I ,finally, at this stage, where I am still actively aware of what i want without my brain influencing me to fit a mold, wrote down who I am and what I want in the future. I wrote down dealbreakers that I wont change to make others happy because at the end of the day, I will be the one regretting the life I never lived to make somebody happy who might not be there forever.

I had taken a break off reddit but just wanted to post mini things I do because I dont want to talk to anybody about my healing because to others I am healed but I still struggle and I want others who have these issues to relate to me or maybe find something in them. :)