Just venting

This week would be my 3 rd week as a new grad 1-2 weeks had to fix alot of things with epic and hwo to get into the pyxis thing but overall i just watch and pass meds all together my preceptor was here for 2 days so i was with somebody else ngl i like it really show me where my weak point where but 1st day had 1 pt wasnt too bad at all i had to get use to things i missed and so on but was pretty good i had 2nd pt had alot of wounds and so on the son ask questions alot and i kinda panic the doctor was in their i also panic a little because i honestly dont know what to say another NP ask how the patient was doing overall but i panic and couldnt understand what do i even say to that but besides the point i did made a mistake because i pulled a opioid on the wrong pt and gave it to my other pt it was the right dose the right everything just wrong pt it scanned throw epic and everything and didnt realize till i look at the mar my heart sunk to the bottom of my ass i thought i would get fired loose my license or to a point though can i even do this job right obviously i told preceptor i told her what happen manager also got pulled u could see the panic and fright in my eyes manager said it was okay and preceptor pulled and say it was a easy fix and to not rush and breathe when i pull meds and read slowly what i’m doing obviously i overthink it all day and now i have to go back tomorrow and i just cant the thought out my mind that i’m not put up for this 2 patient already panic asked about disease process and i don’t even know where to start meds i obviously know some but all not much when i see other peers they got it quick know everything in way and sometimes i just think how did i even pass the nclex how did i even pass nursing school, i hate the thought of not knowing what to do in certain situations and hate that idk the answers to it