Face?

Does anyone ever feel like their face looks weird when you’re talking or interacting with other?

My face is very expressive - I’ve come to realize it after I’ve been told by multiple people that I can’t hide my emotions on my face or that I have “big expressive eyes/facial expressions” totally fine with that - I actually love that about me! That’s not the problem though.

I feel like I have this “idea” of what I look like when I’m talking to others and it’s ALWAYS negative. I always feel so unattractive or that my mouth looks weird or that my face collectively as whole looks weird when I’m talking or conversing. Part of it too is that I had a speech impediment when I was younger - which I took speech therapy for, but sometimes there are instances when I “slip” and I say something that I know didn’t sound right, pronunciation wise. I make fun of myself to ease the embarrassment but it makes me feel like people don’t take me seriously as well.

I’ve never been diagnosed with body dysmorphia but my face specifically has always been my biggest insecurity. I am engaged (not that being attractive matters in this sense) and I’ve had people stop and stare at me or multiple and I mean multiple occasions where I’ve been called attractive or beautiful - I’ve eve been told I should be a model! I do take care of myself and I find myself actually wanting to stand out and get noticed (not in an egotistical, self centered way, just the feeling of being noticed is nice, I guess?) I still just feel everyone is lying to me and are just being nice to not hurt my feelings.

Over the years I’ve seen to have built my confidence and find myself ACTUALLY feeling beautiful, but then I’ll see someone else (coworker for example) who is absolutely gorgeous - beautiful skin, very pretty face to look at. I don’t know I’m ranting at this point but I’ve dealt with this so long it takes such a toll on your mental health 😕.

Can anyone else relate, or have similar experiences?