(Romance) Love doesn't exist, negative state relief is the largest component to helping and taking care of others-the thing we call "love"

Pardon if my thoughts are scattered. I just started writing and didn't stop to edit.

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Seeing suffering causes us to suffer, so we step in to alleviate it, therefore serving ourselves.

Tie in attraction, how long you've known the person-and how much they are in your day to day life -(I believe this really makes a difference as they become your comfort and part of your schedule).

Any changes to what you know causes upset. Other people are an uncontrollable source of anxiety and stress. We mirror them and want them to be happy so we're not bothered. We feel "connected" to someone, realizing or stating this "I love you, I don't want to see you in pain", because we believe we love something other than ourselves. It ties into pride. Gives us stronger, positive feelings and tells our brains we are "in love" with that person.

Especially when it mirrors what we've learned about love and romance from media. The emotions conveyed from our perspective of characters make us feel good, because we hope how they look at eachother (the furrowed brows, soft falling lids and holding eachothers faces) is how we will feel with someone. It *looks* sweet and we're told that the representation is what love should be. It's something we strive for subconsciously in romance.

In the case of being in close proximity to someone and their kindness, we don't know what the other person is thinking, but being on the recieving end of being "loved" (saved, served, cared for) obviously makes us feel good as well, so we may or may not return the favor. Factoring in attraction and how much you can relate to them-determining if this person is a lover or friend.

All in all, there is no all be all higher calling to the person. Doing things because you know the other person needs it. It's looking at their state of being; age (like a stranger helping a child or animal and knowing factually they are more helplesss. Maybe not wanting to see something adorable or cute suffer because it makes us sad), health status, knowing you would want help if you were in that person's situation.

Loving someone; It all starts with us first.

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This came about after realizing I don't feel so strongly about others. Yet I was taught, by watching other people care and how someone looked at me when I was hurt that they were capable of that. And I couldn't fully grasp how they felt so strongly. It was weird to me. I'm fine, just an overthinker and analytical.

Thanks for reading.