I think my bf SA'd me.

This is my first time doing something like this so I'm hoping everything makes sense lol. My bf (23) and I (23 F) have been together for a little over a year. Things haven't been the best and I'm not sure why I'm sticking around but thats not what I want to get off my chest. We have sex,like a lot of couples do and there have been times where it felt weird or violating . One time we were having sex and finished,I looked back and noticed the condom was missing. Asked him what happened to it and he said he took it off cause he wanted to feel me better. He didn't ask me first or tell me when he did it until after we'd already finished. I felt my heart dropped and was so hurt and scared and didn't exactly understand why I felt that way. Another time that has me feeling off/weird was after a night of drinking we came back to my dorm cause he was spending the night and he wanted to have sex and I didn't really want to because I was tired and desperately wanted to sleep. I can't remember everything that happened but I remember him kissing and touching me until we ended up having sex without a condom, even though he knows I prefer them. I told him that I was tired and had to wake up in just a few hours and didn't want anyone to hear us (the walls are ridiculously thin)but he still really wanted too. I tried pushing him off but didn't have much strenght cause I was exhausted and intoxicated. I keep remembering those instances and feel heartbroken and scared and dirty and idk what to do or if is even considered sa.

Just really needed to get this off my chest and thought here might be okay cause I have no friends to talk about it.