😭 I just want to know how and why? 😡

Seeing you with her doesn't even bother me. Seeing you guys together really doesn't bother me. You honestly look so happy when I seen you guys together that day. But I just want to know something. How in the hell can you talk to someone every day almost all day and then just drop them? No explanation. No fuck you. Nothing. I'm not even sure why I walked into that place knowing I would see the two of you together. It felt like my heart has been ripped out of my stomach. It feels like someone punched me in the chest. And now I can't get the thought of you two out of my head. I knew we would never get back together. Honestly I was okay with being friends. I thought we were better friends than lovers. I respected that. But then you do exactly what I asked you not to. To have some fucking respect and tell me what it was. I was always blind to the fact that I was just someone you could have for the time being then get thrown away like a piece of trash. Is that what I am? Trash? I was a good friend to you as well. I was always there for you. I always showed up for you. Even if it was just to fuck and then go home. I did everything you asked of me. I changed who I was for you. Now I don't even know who I am anymore. I blame myself for that. I fucking loved you. I still do and seeing you 2 together that day pissed me off. Not because you are with her. But because you couldn't even respect me enough to tell me " hey this is what it is". Please just message me and tell me why? Tell me how you could just act like I don't exist. Just some kind of explanation. Don't I deserve that? After everything? Now I'm the pathetic one on reddit looking for your dumb ass and hope you see this. Just tell me how and why please. I just want something. What did I do so fucking wrong to get treated like a piece of trash? I'm happy that you are happy , for now. Sooner or later she will start to annoy you. You will start to see her flaws. Because now I honestly believe you are incapable of love. Hopefully you don't do her as dirty as you have done me. Because I don't wish this pain on anyone. It hurts so fucking much.