What do I do? I'm not sure if I was struck by love at first sight, if this is how limerance works, or if we have chemistry. Please advise me girlies!

Background: Okay so I'm dating again, after ending a 13 year relationship, marriage of 4 years in early Jan, and I have a 3 year old. He was abusive and used being AuDHD as an excuse, and I come from a traumatic childhood. I have done 3 years of therapy including EMDR, and working on trusting myself again

I met this guy a week ago off a dating app, and immediately sparks were flying. We "bumped into each other" at a family park event with our respective children, chatted, hugged, and could not get each other out of our minds. My kiddo stayed the night at her dad's place and he invited me over while his kids were asleep just to watch a movie. You can probably guess that didn't happen. We stayed up til 1am doing the deep and meaningful thing, the sexual chemistry was insane, and he told me he's never met anyone like me and never had a connection like this before. I felt exactly the same, but also in the back of my mind know I'm an intense, jump straight in person that can make pretty much anyone feel loved and welcomed. 

Anyway we decide to go exclusive because we're both obsessed, but as we're chatting throughout the week we can't make our respective schedules line up. As I'm a teacher with 2 full days and nights with my girl at her dad's, and he's a tradesman who starts work at 4.30am, has his kids every afternoon and puts them to bed at his exes place as she gets home at 9.30pm. This man is amazing, we have the same values. His parenting is the same as mine, the chemistry is for real, and he's obsessed with me too, but we cannot ever spend time together, so had a heart wrenching conversation on Thursday about calling it off because I need someone who is all in and actually can be with me. 

I am pretty sick so took Friday off work, and this other guy from the dating site who I cancelled on because I was trying/hoping to make things work with sexy tradesman is up in my DMs and wants me to come over. I cannot stop thinking about sexy tradesman, so despite feeling godawful, I have an energy drink and go sleep with this guy to try and shake the feelings for sexy tradesman. Then this morning, sexy tradesman tells me he had a dream about me and we started talking again and I swear I'm addicted to this man! We both know it can't really work with our schedules but so want it to, and he's even saying he started falling for me and the feelings are deep already. So we discuss our flaws to try to put each other off. It doesn't work. Then I tell him I slept with this other guy, and it does work, but he's really hurt because he said "I'm not saying the L word. But the feelings are there and clearly it wasn't mutual". Long story short we spend so long talking, exchanging video messages, and calling. He still wants me. I want him. I'm  going over tonight because the kids are all with our exes, and the feelings are there, but the schedules haven't changed. 

Literally the only red flags I see are that once he seems to have me hooked, he's much less likely to message back. That plus the mutual obsession thing. Also I get the feeling he may be undiagnosed ADHD too. 

So girls, what is this? What do I do? Do I commit and try to make it work, seeing him once a week and not with heaps of communication the rest of the week? Do I completely cut it off and not respond to messages? Something in the middle? Will the feelings just go away in time? Or could this actually be something special?


Love at first sight, limerance, dopamine surging, or plain old infatuation?