Do men finally “get it” at any point?!

I’m a FTM and my partner and I both really wanted children. I’m 33 weeks and my pregnancy has been emotionally anything but smooth. All sorts of things came up with him and even though he’s done a lot of work, I still feel like he doesn’t “get it” if that makes sense. I guess I didn’t realize how immature he is in some ways.. ive become pretty introverted during my pregnancy and normally he and I are both extroverts. He’s always around friends and kind of doing his normal thing, and I feel like I spend a ton of time alone. He’ll be out super late at his friend’s houses multiple nights in a row, I talk to him about it, things change for a week or two, then it happens again. I know infidelity isn’t at play, and when we’ve talked about it he’s said he knows he won’t be able to do that once the baby is here but… what about me? Am I being selfish for wanting him here more or to at least communicate like “hey I’ll be out late tonight” or to just idk tell his friends he should be home with his pregnant partner?? I want him to spend time with friends, I just feel emotionally, sexually, and just totally neglected. Even when he’s been home he’s tired all the time and I think he’s overwhelmed, for context I quit my job, but I just don’t feel super supported and haven’t through my whole pregnancy.

Has anyone experienced this and did it change when the baby was born? Some of my guy friends said it didn’t really hit or change for them until they saw the birth and held their kiddo for the first time. I’m hoping at the very least that’s the case