AITAH for not attending peoples celebratory parties for 10 years, because no one hosted a baby shower for me?

10 years ago I (now 30f) was pregnant with my first (and only) child, back then I had somewhat of a big friend group consisting of 10+ people, which I thought I was close with, and although I didn't have the most supporting family of my own, I thought I at least had become a part of one (judging by how close and friendly my in laws are).

Throughout my pregnancy I was hoping someone would host something for me, but as you all know, no one did. At first I was fine with it, disappointed yeah, but I thought that maybe it wasn't common in my circle to host things like that, so I let it go.

For context, I was the first in my family to get pregnant (before any of my siblings and cousins), also the first in my friend group, but not the first in my in laws family.

Half a year later my in laws hosted one for my bf's cousin, and I remember feeling really hurt by it. I felt like they didn't see me as family since they didn't do anything for me, and this is where my pettiness started. I declined the invitation, and has done so for every celebratory event like baby showers and bachelorette parties for the past 10 years (which mind you have been a lot, I even declined the ones for my own siblings and cousins).

So far, no one has noticed that I keep declining every event, but I feel like it's getting to the point where they might notice soon, especially since I will be expected to host a few in the near future (I will work on myself enough to be able to actually do this though).

So AITAH for declining all of them until now, although it technically hasn't hurt anyone that I have?