I feel like I messed up

Not here to complain or seek advice just to let it out I guess. I fell in love with the game ever since I got it 2 weeks ago and now im playing online since 3 days. Got my first role and was finally getting the hang out of it and enjoying the hell out of this game. I resisted my first attempt when a modder spawned a chest in saint denis (he was a wolf lol and found me hiding in a bush from cops after I killed a civilian who was trashtalking me). At the end of the day I went in valentine to goof around killing lawmen with other players until some modders joined and spawned chests. At first I threw a dynamite at the chest and the pile of players lol until greed took over. I went from 13 gold to 150ish and from 600 to 6k$. Post greednut clarity followed and I feel like I took away the thing that kept me immersed but no idea. I might just buy cosmetics and unlock the dog at the camp and such things to put myself back to where I was.