feeling immense sadness at leaving my internship this semester/saying bye to my supervisor

this semester, i have interned for an office in my career field and have absolutely enjoyed it. it was a rough start—i was a female intern in a division with all men and i realllllyyy had to prove myself to feel respected/like they trusted me. i succeeded, because it got to a point where they would constantly seek me out and ask for help. i got really close to one supervisor in particular, i’ll call him John.

i spent so much time in John’s office just talking about all sorts of things, related to the job or not, and we developed a great relationship where he challenged me to think outside the box, and i could tell he genuinely valued my opinion. in a few weeks, John will be leaving before the official end of my internship and i can already feel the pre-dread and sadness at having to say goodbye.

i’ve had plenty of internships before and never felt this sort of sadness leaving; i know part of it is how i had to challenge myself to assert myself in a male-dominated space and it paid off. i also know part of it is that i always seek approval from male authority figures, so having to let go of those positive interactions is tough. this internship is something that’s always offered at my school, so next semester the office will have a whole new group of interns, and John will be the supervisor for another student like me. i think i’m also feeling premature disappointment thinking about the prospect that John is not going to miss me as much as I will miss working with him. it’s stupid to feel that way, but i can’t help it. i think a part of me is also hoping that when we say goodbye, he expresses his gratitude and tells me how great of an intern i was (because i KNOW i was). i think i will be crushed if he doesn’t acknowledge the work i put in, so i think thats the pre-mature sadness escaping.

i feel silly putting this much stake in someone ive known for a few months, but i can’t control my emotions in that way :/